Disturbing trend to deal with

Updated on: Monday, November 09, 2009

Young lives are being nipped in the bud leaving a trail of pain to the parents and shock to the society. The Gen Next who are supposed to be bold, smart, informed and audacious to take on challenges and enter into fields hitherto untouched seems to be drained emotionally. The rising violent attacks by spurned lovers and suicides by students for no big reasons are of serious concern to the society.

B. Anusha, a final year B.Com student of Villa Marie Degree College jumped to death allegedly because she was unable to bear the constant ‘taunting’ of her classmates, while another young girl attempted suicide because her mother reprimanded her. Recently, a national woman boxer committed suicide and a week before that a NALSAR student killed himself fearing failure. These are just a handful of cases of a long list of suicides among adolescents and youngsters in the city and State.

Raising concerns over the trend, city-based psychologists and counsellors feel it’s time parents and teachers take measures to re-connect with their children. “Parents have to be well-connected with their children and identify if something is wrong. When parents’ are authoritative, they don’t listen to what their child is saying. It is up to the parents’ to extend their support and instil confidence among their children,” says counsellor Swathi.

Parents too are getting caught up in the rat race and intense competition, says K.Vijayalakshmi, a working parent. “Even during summer vacation or winter break, high school students have to attend special classes and tuitions. Even if we dissuade them from attending classes, they go anyways as they don’t want to be pushed to ‘weak’ sections,” she says.
Peer pressure

Lack of coping skills is also a reason for the disturbing trend, feel lecturers and teachers. “Students are not willing to own up any mistakes or face any failure or disappointment of any sort. They want everything to happen quickly,” says Uma Joseph, lecturer, St. Francis Women’s College.

Peer pressure and unhealthy competition too is taking a toll. “Youngsters don’t know where to end this competitive spirit and no longer respect others who are successful. This has to change and the peer group should know where to draw the line,” she adds.

Jyothi Aparna, a principal of reputed school in the city feels youngsters are not mentally prepared to take up any challenges and are overprotected by parents. “Many a time’s parents tell us our child is ‘sensitive’ and are overprotective. For that matter any child is sensitive and it is up to the parent and teacher to tell the child that life is not easy,” she says. Usha. B, who is doing her M.Phil in adolescent suicides, feels that a child needs to be admonished in a positive manner while growing up. “Often in a nuclear family, the child is the king and parents’ give in easily to their demand. They are not admonished and are not taught to face disappointments. When the child grows up and faces failure, everything seems magnified to them,” she explains.
Onus on parents

Youngsters like Keerthana Reddy (name changed) feels parents should be cued in to their children’s emotions. Her younger sister had killed herself four years back unable to bear pressure from her lecturers. “Parents should not ask their children to adjust when they express their problems. They should sit down, talk and sort the matter out,” she says.

Nikhil Rao, a young professional has a different take on the issue. “The present generation while seemingly less reliant on others for execution are actually in need of it more,” he says. Noted Psychologist, C. Veerender says parents can prevent suicides being a little cautious and noticing the suicidal tendencies.

If some commit suicide with immediate emotional decisions majority actually send feelers to parents or friends about their intentions and want them to come to their rescue.

“Parents should identify depression early. Common symptoms are change in eating habits and sleeping habits,” says Mr. Veerender.

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